Need VS Want

Holidays are around the corner. 

That phrase triggers many different thoughts; some people may automatically think of religion when they hear “holiday”, others think about tradition, festive foods , etc.  What troubles me is when holidays are brought up most people will ring shopping into their minds.


When I think of holidays, I always think about my loud loving Italian family.  I then think about all the huge Christmas presents I’ve gotten in the past from my Nonni and Poppi.  Every year Aunt Maria stuffs a 5 foot long stocking with presents for EACH of her three nieces.  When I think about the nearby holidays, I envision the annual Riordan Christmas Tree Picking; we hop in the 2000 Dodge Caravan, head to Poppi’s house, and select the fullest pine tree from the forest of trees my parents planted in Poppi’s acres of land when they first started dating.  I run inside the second we agree on a tree.  I have hot chocolate with Nonni as my dad works his ass off to saw down the tree.  He securely bundles it up for the car ride down the road (the whole time panic stricken because he has no idea how he’ll get this arbor-ic monster into our small living room) .  All while my mom stands over him & tries to support him, and Vanessa chats with Poppi on the porch.

That’s my “holidays are around the corner” type of feel.

I don’t think of shopping because 1. I don’t enjoy shopping & 2. I value more concepts than conformed gift giving.

Yes, to me giving gifts during Christmas time is a conformed act; we buy presents for our loved ones [because we love them] to fulfill social expectation.


I have already heard my friends debate Black Friday Shopping.  Why?  To stock up on things that you don’t need or have space for?  I get it, maybe you Black Friday for the experience.  I’ve gone, you do get a rush.  Scramming to find the TV you saw in newspaper clipping and pushing through crowds with your pals is very entertaining.


If you go Black Friday Shopping go for the amusement & make memories with friends!  Don’t go just to hop on a deal for an item you never thought about.  Black Friday promotes unexpected “necessities”.


It’s November 18th & Santa already came for me- I got AAA Membership and a fat check for Spring 16′ Tuition.  What more do I need?

I’m trying to convenience my mom’s family that we shouldn’t exchange gifts- there are 15 of us and I am the youngest, right now all we need to value is the time we have together.  Everyone in the family knows that Nonni and Poppi are going to give us cash; they would never not give gifts & they’re too old to shop for [any] everyone.  So why don’t we all just give the grandparents small gifts & show the rest that we love them?  My mom only really sees her brother for the holidays, if they really feel obligated to give each other something why don’t they just give each other time?

Poppi and I last Christmas. He’s holding the bird food that my cousin Jess got him (to go along with the birdhouse she bought). He thought the gift was from me, because that’s how much presents matter to him.



One of my least favorite phrases is “OH, I need this!”  To me, the average person doesn’t really think about what a true necessity is.  This phrase should not be tossed around loosely because there is very few things, people [I know] in my age bracket, need.

I ask you, think about what you really need this holiday season.  Maybe you’ll think so hard that you realize what you need is something that can’t be bought.  Or maybe it can!  Which is understandable!  Vanessa and I just got Timberlands because she wanted them and I didn’t have winter boots (plus they were on sale).

But for real, pick through your Need and Want list.  Maybe your spirituality & wallet will be happy that you did!



If you’re looking for somewhere to spend your extra time because you decided that shopping can be substituted for something else… I looked up some food banks that are possibly near you!

Boston Food Banks: donate ; help out

Boston Shelters: Friends of the homeless, Volunteer  ; Rosie’s place (great concept, look it up) volunteer

New Haven Food Banks: numerous pantries in downtown* New Haven looking for food& time donations

I volunteered throughout all of high school at the Downtown Evening Soup Kitchen and know that they welcome extra help around the holiday times






5 Comments Add yours

  1. This post is so near and dear to my heart! Thank you for writing it. If I am completely honest I don’t want to give any “gifts” this year. We don’t need anything. Great post! Thank you. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. velyoung01 says:

    Thanks for sharing!!! When I saw the title I HAD to read it because it reminded me of my own latest post,

    Check it out if you please! Have a wonderful holiday season~ xo ❤ V


  3. leafofspades says:

    I totally hear where you are coming from with Black Friday. Trust me, I think it’s stupid too. Thinking on it though, I can understand why some people feel so compelled to give gifts during this time of year. It’s a way of expressing love to one another, showing that you care enough to use your hard earned cash on them. Of course, I think this idea gets kinda warped at times, like when we trample an old woman to get those boots, that I swear I needed!

    Liked by 2 people

  4. What an inspirational post! ❤

    Liked by 1 person

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